Back on my Highway

Once again I have not done so well in bloggedy-ville. How do you people keep up on this with “so much” going on?! I seriously need to figure out a better time management method… which brings me to my post today.

In exactly 16 days, I am officially stepping back into the workforce as a classroom teacher. With a load of prayers and discussions, there is no doubt in my mind that this is the right thing to do and the right time to do it. Knowing that Tuck is behind the decision 110% makes it even more right.

Those of you who know me might be shocked by this decision, as determined as I’ve always been about staying home with Madison. You may be remembering how thrilled I was to be done with the headaches that came along with being a teacher; though I’ve always loved the teaching part of it. You may even be questioning how adding “one more thing to my plate” is exciting to me; I can seemingly not keep up as it is.

But that’s the jewel of this situation. My new job is not at another elementary school, but at a preschool. I’m going from teaching 4th grade to teaching 4-year-olds!

I will still be at home with my girl – she will be at school the same hours that I am, tuition-free, nonetheless. Those teaching headaches (grading countless papers, taking work home with me, etc) are a thing of the past – I will actually get to enjoy teaching! And finally, that part about adding one more thing to my plate, that’s the best part – for the first time in 5+ years I will be on a daily schedule again.

Think about it: when you’re in elementary, middle and high school, you are given a schedule and a plan. When you go to college, you get to pick your schedule and you have somewhat of a plan. When you have a job, especially as a teacher, you create a schedule and a plan to be even remotely successful.

When you become a SAHM, that all goes out the window. Your schedule is determined by your child/ren and his/her/their needs, whims, emotions, naps, etc, etc, etc. There is no way to realistically say: “I will get this done at 10:00, finish this by 11:00 and finalize that at 3:00.” Because you will probably be changing a blown-out diaper at 10, wiping crayon off the wall at 11 and picking playdoh out of the carpet at 3.

Now please don’t read this wrong. I have LOVED these times with my daughter more than anything else I’ve done in my life (btw: those times are not going away). But I’ve also learned a lot about myself in the time I’ve been home.

While I’ve always seen myself as someone who thrives on being busy, at heart I have the tendency to be lazy. I don’t have an internal motivation to get things done. I do have a lot of things in my life or “on my plate,” but I am apt to ignore the responsibilities until the very last minute. Then I do them halfway. Or not at all.

There’s a verse in Proverbs that talks about when laziness is prominent, your path is full of thorns, but when you’re doing the right thing your path is like a highway. How true this is for me! When I allow the lazy part of me to take over, I am stressed all the time and feel like I have “so much to do.”

As I’ve been attending meetings and working in my classroom to get things ready for the school year, I’ve been amazed with how much is getting done at home, too. I’ve come home from my classroom and just kept on moving to get this and that done, without one iota of stress or feeling overwhelmed at how much I need to get done.

Clearly, that highway mentioned in Proverbs – for me – is being on a schedule. I have high hopes (though no illusions of perfection!) for this school year, for renewed friendships, for my relationship with my girl, for my relationship with my husband… and I hope to record a lot of that here. On my blog. More regularly. See ya.