Failed adoption #1.
After a sufficient time of mourning, we began to see this event as God helping us make the decision to go with adoption instead of IVF, so we moved forward. We passed out our photo portfolio to friends and adoption agencies. Just a month later, on Mother's Day, we were selected by a birth mother through another friend. For 3 months we met with this birthmother, went to her Dr appts and got a nursery ready. Shortly before the baby was born we were told that the birth father wanted to raise the little girl.
Failed adoption #2.
At this point we were beyond heart sick. We decided to take some time "off," we closed the nursery door, fasted every Sunday (a big food day for us!) and prayed for guidance. Literally 40 days later we got a voice mail from Steffany at the adoption agency that did our home study. She wanted to know if we wanted to use the agency to find a birth family, and that their fee had gone up. Since our first 2 attempts were private and would've been MUCH less expensive, I didn't call back.
Steffany called again the next day and told me the fee schedule. I called Tuck, who said that if it was God's will for us to find a baby through the agency, He would provide the financing. What faith he has. I called back and Steffany told me: "Well that's good news because you've been selected by a birthmom!"Almost two months later, Madison was born and life changed, as all parents know. As I continue in the blog world, I hope to share the incredible-ness of our girl. :O) In my next post, however, I need to explain that the ache to give my husband a physical combination of us has not gone away. And probably never will.